Sick and Snow

Little has croup. He woke up with it the night before last. He came into our bedroom fussing and making all sorts of horrible breathing noises. Thankfully, steam helped, but it really freaked me out.

Last night was Big's birthday party so it was a crazy day around here. Between taking care of Little and getting things ready, I was so ready for bed last night. Since we've been sleeping on Little's floor, I'm not exactly rested and my neck is pretty sore.

It is snowing today, so Little and I are having a couch day. We are currently having a Toy Story marathon. We're on the second movie.

I know my posting lately has been sparse, but it's because we've been under the weather and busy with birthday stuff. Big still has a bit of a runny nose and cough and hasn't been getting enough sleep due to all the celebrating.

We went to Pizza Hut for supper on his actual birthday. While we were there, he said, "We can't say
'We should go to a restaurant' anymore. We just have to say 'We should go to Pizza Hut' because that's the only restaurant we have."

Pretty much, buddy. Pretty much.

Cupcake Wars

I just looked at my last post and noticed I wrote it on Sunday. Then I had to ask myself if this was really Tuesday. Whatever happened to Monday, I'll never know.

Anyway, six years ago tonight, Hubby and I were in my hospital room watching the State of the Union Address by George W. Bush. I was in labor. It is somewhat amazing to me that I managed to not miss the State of the Union Address while in no epidural labor (granted I wasn't in active labor yet, but still), but have managed to miss it tonight, because I'm busy making cupcakes for Big to take to school tomorrow for his birthday. My, how my life has changed in six years.

I was actually quite organized and had the cupcakes baked already. And then after supper tonight, Big informed me that I was supposed to provide enough cupcakes for the entire Kindergarten, rather than just his class.

Um, come again?

Praise Jesus there is at least a small Hy-Vee in Smalltownsville, so I was able to run and get another cake mix.

Did I mention I only have one cupcake pan, so I have to keep baking a dozen at a time? Not exactly the most efficient way of doing things. I'm hustling and bustling so fast I feel like I'm on an episode of Cupcake Wars. Thank the good Lord above I'm not being judged by Florian Bellanger.

So here I am, eating a bowl of Lucky Charms for supper while at my computer trying to catch up on some things in between flying cupcake pans. Oh, the Lucky Charms for supper? Well, I simply wanted a night off from cooking. These people seem to think I need to feed them three meals a day! Can you believe it?

Yep, my life has sure changed in the last six years.

For the better.

Six

Today we were supposed to celebrate Big's 6th birthday. His actual birthday isn't for three more days, but today was the day everyone was coming to party. But Big came home sick from school on Friday, and still had a fever yesterday, so it got postponed. 

I wanted to blog tonight, but wasn't sure of the topic, so I started perusing through old photos from the original days on this blog - when Big was referred to as Munchkin, and we were a family of three. 

Warning: If you do not wish to be overwhelmed by cuteness and nostalgia, stop reading NOW!

Just stop it!

See, I told you. Look at that face. No, don't look at it. I just can't handle it. Someone make me stop.

 Now would someone please tell me what I'm supposed to do with this face?

 Not to mention this one.

 My baby! Waaaa!!! 

(That's me crying, not the baby. Sorry for the confusion.)

Big on his first birthday. 

Make.It.Stop.

 With his Great Grandpa Bradfield who is now in Heaven.

Yep, here come the tears.

 Big's first Easter. 

 A boy after my own heart. A lover of chocolate.

 Big with our then neighbor, and his forever friend. They are almost exactly three months apart in age.

I love them.

Trying to figure out how to eat corn on the cob. 

He's made lots of progress in this area of development since then.

 Oh my gravy. I just don't even know.

Sigh.

My always happy boy.

 The good old days of summer going to the pool together. Just the two of us.

 Wearing Great Grandpa Gebhards army hat. Helmet?

 His mind has always been one of sense and order.

 But he has his moments of chaos, too.

 His second birthday.

His first trip to Colorado.

He's always up for an adventure. 

Supporting me at my first 5k.

My cheerleader. Always has been. Always will be. 

 My baking assistant. 

 My helper. My buddy.

Forever, my love.

Sigh

Have you ever thought about all the different reasons a person sighs? I hadn't really until I was trying to fall asleep last night. Last night, I had lots of reasons to sigh.

First, I had a sigh of relief that Hubby was finally home after being out of town for work all week. Life is just better when he's here. Single parents, I do NOT know how you do it.

Then there was the trying-to-keep-my-cool sigh. Big has been sick and I was losing my patience after attempting to get him to take his medicine and him refusing.

A sigh of relaxation soon followed when my head finally hit the pillow. I love sleep. Especially when Hubby is home and I know he'll get up with kids if needed.

As I was putting Little to bed last night I experienced the sigh of disbelief. How is it possible that he is so grown up already?

I wonder why God created the sigh. Does God sigh? Does He sigh in disappointment when we disobey? Does He sigh in contentment after we repent? Does He sigh at the sheer marvelousness of His creation?

But for now, I'll set aside my wonderings and sigh out of sheer thankfulness for my blessing of the three males in my home that quite frankly, love me more than I deserve.

Amen.

I Heart a Late Start...

...when it comes to getting Big to school in the mornings.

Due to the cold weather, his school has a two hour late start in the morning. Praise be! It isn't so much fun waking him up in the mornings and getting him out the door. Although, I'm sure every parent can relate. I've never heard a parent say how easy it was/is to get her child(ren) out the door.

This morning was an especially hard morning. So hard, in fact, that Big was almost late to school and after school we had to apologize to each other (actually, now that I think of it, I'm the only one who apologized) for how the morning went. When I put him to bed tonight, we both promised to try harder tomorrow. That was before I found out about the two hour late start. If tomorrow morning is as bad as this morning was, then I should turn in my parenting keys.

In other news, I entered a new parenting frontier today. I bought Big some wrestling shoes after school. Just another moment in my life when I realized the years are slipping away and my children will be moved out and on their own before I know it.

In other, other news, I went to my mom's today so I could be her chocolate angel food cake apprentice. Her mom made the best, as in B.E.S.T, chocolate angel food cakes you've ever imagined. Big requested one for his birthday party that's coming up. I've never made one by myself before. I only made them with my grandma. I know there were times my mom wanted to rip the spatula, measuring cup, spoon, egg, pretty much you name it, out of my hand and just do it herself. I'm sure it was painful for her to watch. But, we got it done and hopefully I can build up more confidence to do one on my own someday. I mean, I have to in order to carry on the family tradition. Chocolate angel food cake in this family is like what pasta means to an Italian family. Ok? Got it? Un-der-stood?!

So, like, basically no pressure.

The party is Sunday, so I'll let you know how the cakes turns out.

Peace.

Homesick

Today is the first day I've felt homesick at all. And I know exactly why I feel this way. Tomorrow is my first meeting with my new MOPS group. It makes me miss my old group terribly.

My MOPS group in the city was totally my life source. When I became a mom for the first time I pretty much hated my life. I know that seems harsh, but having a newborn is the hardest thing I have ever done. Ever. Period. And I don't just mean the physical aspect of having a newborn come out of your body. That was pretty difficult, too.

I could barely get out of bed in the morning. I completely neglected myself and my husband. Getting dressed was rare, showers were but a faint memory. I was alone. Isolated. Cut off from the outside world (having a newborn in January didn't help that part). My basic daily agenda consisted of survival, and that was pretty much it.

But then I found MOPS and I connected with other moms who were in the exact same place. I could be myself and not feel ashamed. In fact, I felt loved, encouraged and cheered. I was in my MOPS group for six years. They were embraced me. The mess of a person I was and am.

I'm sure my new group will be just as wonderful, but I'll have to go through the whole process of making new friends again. I know I can do it. I've done it before. But it's not something I particularly love. In fact, it is something I literally have to force myself to do. I like to be quiet and keep to myself.

So tomorrow, I'll put on another brave face and try to connect.

For now, though, I'll just be homesick for my MOPS sisters in the city.
You know who you are. And I love you.

Big's Big Day

Yesterday was a very big day for the biggest men in this house. Big went to his first wrestling practice!

Hubby is in hog heaven.

Hubby was a wrestler all through high school and even went to state his senior year. I know it is one passion that he wished he could somehow still incorporate into his life. Until he had sons, it wasn't a reality. Then, once his boys arrived, he was finally able to start reliving that part of his life. And I know he has just been waiting for the day that one of his boys actually started wrestling.

Well, that day was today. It is a youth wrestling league at Big's elementary for preschool through second graders. Hubby went with him and said he did great. Big said he had fun and even beat someone in first grade! Then he proceeded to tell me that someone was a girl, but he didn't hurt her.

Now we just need to buy him some wresting shoes. Hubby is ecstatic.

And for the record, I know nothing about wresting. I've never even seen a wrestling match.

And I'm not a fan of singlets.

But I probably would have been if I would have gone to one of Hubby's matches in high school.

Yes, I just typed that. I apologize, but I'm just being honest.

Have Your Way In Me

I had one of those moments today. A moment for which I'd been waiting. I knew it would happen. I couldn't wait for it to happen. And it happened.

Do you ever have a moment when all is right? You know your life is on the right track. You know you're going the direction you're supposed to be traveling?

When we were considering and praying about this move, we felt from the very beginning, this was what God wanted us to do. Sometimes, there's no room for doubt. Sometimes, the choice you need to make is clear as day. Those times are few and far between, but I believe the closer you are to God, the more common that becomes.

While we were still living in the city and I would think about this move and all the work it would be and how uncomfortable it would make us in a lot of ways and how this is not what I would choose for my life, I knew it was right.

One of my favorite songs right now is "Life My Life Up" by Unspoken. As I would be waiting to pick up Big from school in the city, I would turn on the Christian radio station. This song would come up often and it was really my anthem during that time of uncertainty and transition. In a lot of ways, I knew it was God confirming what our decision needed to be.

Well, today, as I was waiting to pick up Big from school in Smalltownsville, the Christian radio station was actually coming in and wouldn't you know, that song was playing. And that was my moment. I knew God would do it, I was just waiting for it. I was sitting there in the car on the other side of the situation and felt completely validated and peaceful that we'd done the right thing.

Enjoy the song.

And support Christian radio. Enough said.
For now.
I could get on a soapbox, but I won't.

Peace, love, and Christian radio. Amen.

On a Roll

We're on a roll here at the old homestead. We're slowing but surely making progress.

The trim is almost all put back on in the dining room.
Walls are being prepped for painting
Measurements have been taken for new flooring
A new front door handle and lock have been purchased, as well as some new lighting and new towel rods New address cards have been sent and the next two days will be spent shopping. Finalizing flooring and paint colors are on the agenda.
Oh, and last, but not least, Hubby can now park in the attached garage as opposed to the unattached.

Oh, and I'm also planning Big's 6th birthday party in the mix. Six! Six? Don't even get me started.

The main flooring guy, the one putting hardwood in our mast bedroom (yes!) can't come until March. Yes, this will make the process a bit longer, but that's ok. I need to get rooms painted before new flooring comes in. This will give me plenty of time.

I hope.

I'll admit, it has been a struggle getting things done with two young humans in the house. They need our time and attention, as well. Actually, they need it more than any house project on our list. So, it is a daily struggle finding that balance.

Other than that, we seem to be getting into a routine once again.

Did I mention Big's going to be six!?!?!

Six. What just happened to my life?

You Don't Even Know

Don't get me wrong, I love my life. I adore my children and am blessed beyond measure. But this is just how I'm feeling today. I could watch this again and again. Enjoy!

Jan. 12th

Today would have been my Grandma B's 91st birthday.

Today we celebrated my nephew's 2nd birthday at my brother's new house. It is a lovely house and just has that "homey" feeling to it. I'm so happy for them. It is in Middle of Nowhere, Iowa and was a little over a two and a half hour drive for us. The drive this morning was fun - traveling through parts of the country I've never seen before. The drive back was fine, just tiring. We'll all exhausted. I think it's because of the excitement of last night's bat episode. We all went to bed late, and by 7:20 this morning, all four of us were in bed together.

Tomorrow begins another week. Hopefully one without bats.

Amen.

B is for Bat

It is just now after 10:30 p.m. I just got done putting the boys to bed after being held hostage in Big's room for an hour while Hubby caught a bat in our living room. That's right a bat!!!! Ewwwwwwwwwww, yikes, gross, eeeeeeeekkkkkk!!!

Heaven help me. I may not be able to survive this.

We're thinking it came in through the chimney. Actually, I'm trying not to think about it.

When it comes to bats, rats, mice, snakes, spiders and the like, I'm a total girl. Can't stand them. I scream and run. That's been my most effective method of dealing with such creatures.

Hubby has to go out of town soon for work. What if another one of those things gets in our house????!??!?? The thought alone might send me into tremors. But, I think I have a plan. I'll hightail it out of the house with the boys and call either my dad or father-in-law to come catch it. And I won't return to the house until Hubby's back in town. Sounds like the most logical plan to me.

I might have a plan for the next time a bat enters the house (which is hopefully never) but what is the plan of survival for tonight? Of course I flinch at every little sound I hear and I'm still shaking on the inside. I will also probably sleep with my head under the covers. You know, because I'm brave like that.

Big was so excited to see the bat once Hubby caught it. I, on the other hand, stayed upstairs. But, once it was time to go to bed, Big was almost in tears wanting someone to sleep with him in case a bat came in his room during the night. I did the motherly thing and told him he needed to be brave and that a bat wouldn't come in his room during the night, but we came up with a game plan in case one did. We prayed that God would protect him and that no more bats would come in the house. All the while, during my pep talk to Big, I was inwardly relieved that I actually have someone to sleep with me tonight. Hubby may have my fingernails permanently embedded in his arms by morning. Isn't he lucky?

Well, so much for my productive evening of laundry and addressing our "New Year, New Address" cards. Hubby just returned from setting the bat free out in the country. I'm hoping waaaaaay out in the country. At least, that's what I'll tell myself.

Did I mention I don't particularly care for bats?

This

This.

This little baby.

This little baby boy.

This little baby boy is no longer a baby.

I'm not sure I can handle this.

Last night was his last night in his crib. Tonight is his first night in a toddler bed. He's been climbing in and out of his crib for well over a week now. I know it's time.

But I'm not sure I can handle this growing up thing.

STOP IT!

I can't handle this.

I'm leaving now before this nonsense goes any farther. Goes any further? Farther? Further? Further? Farther? Who knows. But all I know is, it must stop now!

Ode to the Teal Sink

Disclaimer: We have yet to find the cord to our camera, so the following pictures are from Hubby's phone from when we were house shopping. Therefore, the previous owners were still living in the house. So, please be respectful of their things and wipe your feet before entering the door.

On an unrelated note, but equally important disclaimer, I may or may not be eating lunch while I post this. And I may or may not have just gotten sour cream on the computer; I couldn't rightly say. But please don't mention this to my computer engineering husband if he asks.  

Oh teal sink, I love you so
Just how much, you'll never know

For I'm hoping that someday
You'll go far,
Far, far away

Oh teal sink, I love you so
Just how much you'll never know

For I'm hoping someday soon
I'll sweep you up
with a broom

Oh teal sink,
I'm sure I think
At least
you are not

PINK....

Oh vey!

An Ode to the Pink Bath coming soon!

All my friends drive pickups.

Over the past couple of days I've had some old friends visit. It has been incredible having some adult interaction with other females. Not only has it encouraged me to know that I will, indeed, have friends, but it has also been fun seeing people who have known me forever and to see their children. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, does it? Man, it warms my heart.

Yes, it will be a sweet thing rekindling old friendships. The old shall be made new.

Or something like that.

But apparently, there's one thing I've forgotten about living in Smalltownsville - pickups are the vehicle of choice.

My dear friends in the city drive SUV's and minivans. Here, in the country, all my friends drive pickups. Yep, even the young moms.

Disclaimer: To my friends (who knows if you even read this silly little blog) to whom I'm referring - I know I can say these things because you'll just laugh at me. And I know that you know I'm not making fun of you. I adore you and am so thankful to have you back in my life. 

And sometime, I can I drive your truck? 

Little House on the Prairie

The other day I was unpacking our books. Before being mommy to Big and Little, I was an elementary teacher. I taught 5th grade and 2nd grade. Needless to say, I have oodles of children's books. And I'll never get them. No, you can't make me!

One series that I have is Little House on the Prairie, but this particular series, I had long before my teaching days. I've loved those books my entire life. My mom read them when she was a child and she read them to me when I was a child. The memories are still vivid of her sitting on the side of my bed reading them to me. Like I said, I was always a fan. She and my dad even took me to Mansfield, Missouri to see Laura's home there. It was an amazingly lovely experience. In fact, I'd love to go back some day.

Not only do I love the books, but I also love the T.V. show. I liked it somewhat as a girl, but now that I'm older, I adore it. No, it isn't very much like the books, but there's just something charming about the show. It's focus on family, faith and community are heartwarming and remind me of home. I own each season and have watched every single episode, more than once. They were my constant companion when I was a nursing mother. The show was an actual instrument in my survival as a mother of a newborn.

Am I ashamed to admit that I still love to read the books? No, absolutely not. Are you surprised to know I'm reading through the series again? Right now, I'm about to finish Farmer Boy. My mom still reads them from time to time. Ever feeling down about winter (this would be the perfect year for that...brr), read The Long Winter and you'll realize that you are, indeed, a pansy.

I also love reading the story of Laura and her husband, Almanzo.

Most of the time, when I see photos of people taken from this time period, the people look almost frightening. But I don't find that to be true with them. I mean, Almanzo could even be called good looking.

See what I mean?

And Laura's a simple beauty.

Sometimes, I wonder why I love the books so much? Is it because they were read to me as a child? Perhaps, but I think it's because although you know Laura's life was not easy, she writes about it as though it was charming. You know she was a little girl that was loved and cared for and saw her life through rose colored glasses. She didn't focus on the hardships, although she wrote about them, but they didn't define her life. She came from a loving family who counted their blessings and were thankful for the little they had.

That's so unlike me. I feel like most of the time I'm focusing on all the challenges (which aren't very big challenges compared to what Laura faced) and simply overlook my blessings.

So as I was organizing all my books the other day, I made sure to tell Hubby to keep these books easily accessible. Sometimes, I just need a little Laura in my life.

Family Time

Today my niece and nephew came over. Oh boy did the kids have fun together. Four kids ages five and under makes for an adventurous day.

My best friend, and cousin, also came over today with her sweet little three month old. She was just precious and still had that sweet baby smell. Ta die for!

Tomorrow one of Big's friends is coming over to play. He's been missing his friends from the city, so hopefully tomorrow will cheer him up. Also, tomorrow is the last day of Christmas break. I know most parents are ready for their child(ren) to go back, but I'm not. I've loved having him home, and I know Little has, too. We'll be lost in this big old house by ourselves on Tuesday.

Schools in the area that are supposed to be back in session tomorrow have already canceled due to the frigid temperatures. I'm so ready for spring. Although, I've been trying to see this wintertime move as a blessing in disguise. I would have certainly never chosen to move during the winter, but the cold weather and snow have forced us to be indoors. Since we have to be indoors, we're getting more work done on the house than we probably would if it were summertime.

Once it is summertime, hopefully all our boxes will be unpacked and we'll be fully settled. I know all our house projects won't be done, but the small ones should be, so we'll have time to enjoy summer in the country! Eeek! I can't wait!!! There will be fishing, people. Lots and lots of fishing!

Since we had four small shenanigans around all day, Hubby and I are going to veg tonight after the boys are asleep. Hubby's putting them to bed now. I should go wash dishes, but I'd rather stare at the wall and ponder life. Or go find some chocolate. Or basically do anything other than wash dishes. I guess hanging out with four shenanigans will do that to ya.

Thoughts

Nothing can prepare you for cleaning bathrooms in an all male home. (Well, all male, except yourself.)
Gross.

I've been suffering from anxiety today.
I need a vacation.

It is amazing that you can be totally frustrated and annoyed with a person but in the same instant still love him so much it aches.
Parenthood.

I'm contemplating doing a half marathon.
I need a therapist.

There have been numerous times since moving to Smalltownsville that I've wanted to stop what I'm doing (usually while driving) to take a picture.
I need to get a better camera. Or at least carry the one I have.

I'm ready for spring.
The end.

Decisions

The thing about moving to a new house, especially one that has a very good likelihood that you'll live in for the rest of your life, especially one that needs work done to it, is deciding which project to do first.

I've mentioned our list before. The longer we live in our new home, the longer our list seems to get, which isn't a surprise. However, how do you choose which project to do first? When it comes to items such as new windows, we know that needs to be high on the list. Considering it is a safety hazard that most of our windows won't open, it is an obvious choice to put on the top of the priority list. 

Little things, like new furniture and decorating how you want to, should be moved to the bottom of the list. Necessities first, wants last. 

But what's a girl to do when she knows that eventually she will get new bedroom furniture and she finds this...

 

Be still my heart. 

Let's all have a moment of silence.

I love this bed from Pottery Barn, and it's currently on sale. This bed is gorgeous, has storage underneath, and is the stuff of which dreams are made. Pun intended.

What's a girl to do?

Especially when she finds these shams and duvet cover - also on sale from Pottery Barn.

Day One

Well, it's day one of 2014. Happy New Year!

We had fun having our indoor supper picnic and watching Epic. Everyone thoroughly enjoyed the movie. Immediately afterward, the boys went to bed. Hubby had to do some work on the computer, so while he worked on the laptop, I picked another movie. I decided to go with the original Batman with Michael Keaton. Good times. I'm pretty pathetic, though, and with only about 20 minutes left of the movie, with an hour until midnight, I went to bed. I just couldn't do it. I've never been much of a night owl. Oh well, 2014 came regardless of my sleep schedule.

The first day of 2014 has been absolutely wonderful. Hubby and Big went skiing today, so Little and I have enjoyed a nice, quiet day together. It also snowed most of the day, so we simply enjoyed the warm indoors. Honestly, I didn't expect to get anything done today. Or, at least, I told myself I wasn't going to be productive today. I love it when I give myself permission to do nothing. Wouldn't you know, I got quite a bit accomplished. I've noticed that's not too uncommon. On days when I'm killing myself to get things checked off my to-do list, I accomplish zip. On the days I don't plan on doing anything, I'm completely productive. 

Little and I are now snuggled on the couch waiting for the big guys to get home from their ski day. 

On another, completely unrelated note, we got my mom family pictures for her birthday this year. They were taken at the end of November and I'm just getting around to posting them. I thought I'd share some of my favorites from the day.

This is my nephew. Big calls him Chubby Cheeks. I'll let you guess why. 

This is Chubby Cheek's big sister. Or shall I say, older sister. They're pretty close in age, and in size. Goodness, this girl is precious. 

This is my brother's sweet family.

Big. I was so looking forward to this photo shoot, because I'm really not good about getting pictures taken of the boys regularly. I have so many friends that get their kids' pictures taken every month for the first year, and then every year for the rest of their lives. I'm doing good if I get pictures taken of my boys every year and a half - even when they're babies. 

And this is why. 

Oh dear. 

Ah, much better. There's my sweet boy.

Of course. I should have known.

Ok, I can't take this cuteness. How did this child grow up so fast? I look at this and recall him laying on my lap as a newborn in the hospital. I remember tears rolling down my cheeks and thinking he was the sweetest baby in the world. He's still so sweet, but a lot more mischievous now. But in this pictures, he's still that sweet newborn to me.

Here I am with the father of my children. Also known as my husband. 

Remember me saying Little is a lot more mischievous now? I'm not sure if you can tell, but Hubby is running after him in this picture. The second reason I chose this picture is to illustrate where we've moved. See the wide open spaces? This is my parents' house - where I grew up from the age of 4 to 18. I loved it here. I still do.

See the old run down building in the background? That was our playhouse as children. My grandpa built it. There are now black raspberry bushes all around it. My mom makes the best homemade black raspberry jelly.

Precious children, who look almost identical.

My brother and his wife. He is one lucky guy.

Ok, everyone smile. 

Um, what?!?

There we go.

My sister and her husband. He is one lucky guy. 

Can you tell I love the women in my family?

The 'rents.

We had to try and get one with our dog, Buddy. He entered our lives just before I graduated from high school because I begged to keep him.

I'm the youngest.

My parents are eternally grateful.

Or something.

And last, but certainly not least, just in case you were doubting it, the following will illustrate that there is, indeed, a lot of love in this family.

Even between brothers. Amen.